Alabama
Alaska
Arizona
Arkansas
California
Colorado
Connecticut
DC
Delaware
Florida
Georgia
Hawaii
Idaho
Illinois
Indiana
Iowa
Kansas
Kentucky
Louisiana
Maine
Maryland
Massachusetts
Michigan
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
North Carolina
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Oregon
Pennsylvania
Rhode Island
South Carolina
South Dakota
Tennessee
Texas
Utah
Vermont
Virginia
Washington
West Virginia
Wisconsin
Wyoming
Top parenting stories this week
Coping with Invasive In-laws
How to keep the peace and establish a strong bond between your child and his grandparents.
by: Armin Brott
In This Article
Interfering In-laws
- Establish your own roles as parents and be clear about how you want to address various parenting issues; then share your decisions with your in-laws.
- Be diplomatic, but firm, when it comes to conveying how you've decided to approach childrearing.
- Show your appreciation for all the help your in-laws offer and pick your battles over what really matters to you most.
- Involve your in-laws in your children's lives and encourage the bond between them by staying in touch, visiting often and encouraging shared hobbies.
uch as you may not want to hear this, in the minds of your in-laws, their opinion does matter more than yours. They've done this all before and, when it comes to their grandchild, they consider themselves to be the best authority on everything from feeding and sleeping to discipline and toilet training. That's a tough mindset to change, but you can do it and keep the peace at the same time. Here's how to cope with interfering inlaws:
Establish your own roles as parents
The big kicker is that your partner has to be on board with you in order to present a united front. First of all, you need to have some serious discussions about what, exactly, your independent roles as parents are going to be. It's not uncommon for couples to have very different expectations when it comes to parenting.
So be very specific with each other about who'll be doing what. Who gets up for those 3 a.m. feedings? Who's responsible for the diapers–both changing and buying? When will you introduce solid foods and what will that first food be? Should your baby sleep in the same bed as you and your partner? Are you going to teach your baby sign language? A lot of couples avoid dealing with these issues because they're afraid they'll lead to conflict, but dealing with them now will make life easier for both of you in the long run.
